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A father noticed that his son was spending way too much time playing computer games. In an effort to motivate the boy to focus more on his schoolwork, the father said to his son, “When Abe Lincoln was your age, he was studying books by the light of the fireplace.’’ The son replied, “When Lincoln was your age, he was The President of The United States.’’ |
Three dogs, a Chihuahua, a
Doberman and a Bulldog, all sat near their favorite local fire hydrant when a
great-looking female Collie strolled by. She wagged her tail and said,
“I’ll go on a date with whoever can say liver and cheese in a single
sentence.”
Quickly, the Doberman said, “I love liver and
cheese.” The Collie replied, “That’s not good enough.” The
Bulldog said, “I hate liver and cheese.” She laughed and said,
“That’s not creative enough.” Finally, the Chihuahua smiled and
said, “Liver alone, cheese mine.”
Overheard on a recent
flight:
“As you exit the plane, please make sure to gather all of your
belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the flight
attendants. Please do not leave children or spouses.”
Seen on the door of a plastic surgeon’s office: “We can help you pick your nose!”
America is the only country where you can borrow a $10,000 down payment from a relative, get a $60,000 first mortgage, a $30,000 second, and be called a homeowner.
Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.
Overnight Lite
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