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A man walked into his VFW Club and announced to his buddies, "The doctor just gave me only six months to live, so I'm defecting to join the KGB." "What?" the old warriors gasped in disbelief. "You spent your whole life fighting against them! Why switch sides now, when you're about to die?" The man replied, "Better one of them than one of us." |
Sign we saw: "We apologize that this restaurant is not wheelchair accessible, but some of our other locations are. For details, please inquire inside."
| Q: | Why did the guru refuse Novocaine at the dentist? |
| A: | He wanted to transcend dental medication. |
Patient: "Doctor, I think I'm a deck of cards!" Psychiatrist: "Sit down. I'll deal with you in a minute."
Did you hear about the Siamese twins who moved to England so the other one could drive?
| Q: | How many knitters does it take to change a lightbulb? |
| A: | None-they'd rather knot. |
"I wish I had your willpower."
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